Bobby posted a condolence
Wednesday, May 18, 2016
I wanted to take some time to write a story and share my experience with a woman who I had come to known as "Grandma". The plan is for this story to be one where she is to always be remembered as I remember her....my hero.
I was 8 years old when my Mom spoke to me about meeting her mom and that she was going to be staying with us for awhile. At first I was puzzled and a bit nervous becase it was always just us 3, My Mom, Michael and I and being the age that I was at, I did not welcome change nor grasp what family was outside of what we had....luckily I was only 8 so naitivity can only be expected at that age.
When I was first introduced to her, she didn't speak a lick of english and I did not speak a lick of farsi (it was like a scene out of stepbrothers where both brothers just stare at each other trying to figure out where one goes from here) Of course her being the much more older and distinguished woman that she was, came up to me and gave me the warmest hug with the biggest smile ever (as if I was her own kid) and I instantly felt a comforting feeling like this is going to be ok.
The first few months were the hardest, it was almost like a culture shock for both of us-I did not know who in there right mind still had hung clothes using a clothesline and she couldn't grasp how one kid this young could sit in front of the tv all day and watch cartoons. We both decided that we needed to get on the same page however there was still that gap of trying to communicate with each other (sign language just wasnt cutting it anymore) We both agreed that we would teach other how to speak our native tongue (thanks mom for translating :) ) So every day for two hours, we would spend time teaching each other the basics and going through the motions...this went on for months until we were able to understand each other (in the simplest way possible) This only helped us thicken the bond we were slowly starting to build.
We finally reached a point where we could communicate and understand each other! YAAY US!!!! This added a new dynamic to our ever growing relationship because I now had someone to confide in-someone to vent to when a kid at chucke cheese kicked me, someone to hold when I was feeling down because the girl in my 8th grade class rejected me to the homecoming dance, and someone to congratulate me when I got my first 25cents raise after being at my job for a year. Yes, at the age of 15, she was there watching me grow up in front of her and as what she did with her daughter and son(s) before her, she did it again with Michael and I....talk about a hard job ey?
As the years went on and I started growing up a bit, I was able to work my way into the adult workforce at the ripe age of 17.5 years old. Being at this age and being ahead of the curve while still being in community college with no degree or experience to my name, I started to let this get to my head....there was this arrorgance about me that was immiedietly noticed by my Grandma which she wanted no part of....well being the woman that she was, she asked me politely if I could drive her to Chucke Cheese to visit an old friend that happened to still work there, I obliged and took her...little did I know that I was about to get a severe reality check. She asked that I walk in with her and wait until her friend arrives from break (which of course I thought nothing of and did) We grabbed a table and "waited" for her friend to get off break..during this time, we saw Chucke walk out waving to the kids and me being the little sh*t that I was started laughing saying his life must really suck having to do that....and at that moment, that was the last sentence I ever got out of my mouth.
(Please note that this next part is the cleaned up version lol)
"Do you think you are better than everyone else because of where you are? Do you think that person was afforded the same situations that you were? Do you think that person isn't working just as hard as you did cleaning toilets, walking around in a hot, sweaty costume getting kicked by kids everyday?" At this point, I was in a state of shock, not only was I surprised by the amount of curse words coming out of her mouth but at the same time, I never thought about things that way...I mean here I am driving a brand new Toyota Camry SE (whoooa so cool, right?) with a subwoofer, rolling into work, reverse parking like I am some bad-butt not even thinking about the next person who probably worked just as hard as I did to make it to the next paycheck. I was instantly humbled after this...which is exactly what she was going for....asking to go wait for a non-existent friend in a location where my first job which I hated on the daily...that devious woman knew all along!
From there on out, things were pretty much as you all have come to known now (minus a few bumps along the way) and it became her and I thick as thieves....no subject of conversation was safe (even Michael and his unsightly beard) no joy ride around town was long enough, no insults amongst each other were to harsh (i lie, she always cut deep) and no food she cooked for me was ever left untouched. That was just what we had and who we became.
Imagine, a wide eyed 8 year old kid with no sense or understanding of what family meant having to grow up with his Grandma for 20 years...slowly becoming a man of family and doing everything in his power to become the man his hero wanted him to be.
For the little good I have in me, it was because of her, for the man that I have become today, it was because of her and for the life I was blessed to experience with her...I wouldn't change it any of it for a second. This is just a small experience I could share about my Grandma and while I could go on for the next year about stories I have, I will leave you all on this note......My grandma was the kind of woman who would open her heart to any stranger and make them feel like a part of the family, she loved everyone and she wanted everyone around her to feel welcomed. This is who I strive to be and I hope one day, I could be just an ounce of what she was and who she wanted me to be.
